yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
