I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
