butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
