yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
they need to just BURY HIM!
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
