I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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