I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
