is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
She's the barista slut.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
We don't watch enough power rangers
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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