we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
