I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
