I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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