They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
