She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
