My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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