i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
My liver just had a heart attack.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
