he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
