She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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