in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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