It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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