And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Just pee around me
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
