I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
