Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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