You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
