everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
