RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
