I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
