You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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