If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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