Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I have feelings that need drinking.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
