is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
