Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
My life is pants optional.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
