don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
