you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
