Whod you bang
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
