She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
