If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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