brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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