We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
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