now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
