That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I am midnight drunk by noon
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Randomize
