The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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