Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
