Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
