love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
