Your tits are I can't wait for
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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