I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
