Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize