Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm too high and old for this...
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
