I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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