this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
