Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
